Showing posts from November, 2016

I Want Christmas, Continued!

I always love the Christmas season, but this year, more than ever, I need a good old-fashioned one.  I have a terminal case of We-Are-Going-To-Have-a-Sociopath-in-the-White-House Syndrome.
Even back in ancient times, before cable TV, smartphones and the Internet, we knew how to celebrate the Christmas season.
It always started off with the annual collection.  This was my idea.  All three of us Minicozzi kids would pool our money together to buy gifts for Dad, Mom, Grandma and Grandpa.  As the Advent season ground on, we would add whatever coins we could spare to the fund, and by a few days before Christmas we would have enough to get something nice for all four of them.
“Nice” was a relative term.  Our family was working class, and we lived in a small town, next to a small city, in the middle of the apple growing area of Washington State.  Nobody in our family expected diamonds or anything like that.  We weren’t rich, not by any kind of stretch.  Some sweet-smelling hand lotion from t…

I Want Christmas!

I know.  Thanksgiving Day hasn’t even come yet, and I’m on Christmas already.  This year (2016) I am in desperate need of Christmas, more than ever.  It’s one of the symptoms of a disease called We-Are-Going-to-Have-a-Sociopath-In-The-White-House Syndrome.
What Not to Give Me (A Single Female Baby Boomer) for Christmas

Everyone likes to get presents.  I am no exception.  There are times, though, when a thoughtful gift can turn into a pain in the ass.
Take large plants, for example.  There are people who love spending time with plants.  I am not one of those people, and there are many more of us.  Plants don’t like me.  I think plants are fine, so long as someone else is taking care of them.  I am the kind of plant parent who thinks that plants should be seen, but not in your face.  When I DO give a plant attention, it is a death sentence.  Plants take one look at me and die, because they know they are doomed, anyway.  Never give someone like me a plant, if you value its life.
Please do…

A Black Friday Poll

Yes, I know.  It isn’t time for Christmas-related stuff yet.  We haven’t even had a chance to survive Thanksgiving Day.  That’s a whole other thing itself.  There is one aspect of the Christmas season, though, that we should address before it has a chance to overcome us:
Black Friday

I would like to conduct a little poll to see what my readers have planned for Black Friday.  Please choose one of the following:
I plan to:
(A)  Hide at home, with all doors and windows locked, binge-watch episodes of “Law and Order” on TV and eat Vanilla Almond Granola directly out of the box.
(B)  Do all my Christmas shopping in one day – online – sitting in front of my computer wearing PJs.
(C)Get to Target, Kmart or Walmart before anyone else, defend my place in line with a baseball bat and a shotgun and bring someone with me who has sharp elbows and good shoving skills.If possible, bring my scariest-looking relatives with me, male and female, including kids.
(D)Refuse to think about Christmas shopping un…